I really love this show, and I haven't been a faithful watcher in every season, but I am committing myself to watching this season. I sit here on the couch watching the episodes, and I just want to get up and do what they are doing, I really want to go to the gym more, and it seems like now that I am only a few minutes away from it until April, I am having a lot of trouble being able to get there. My foot is an issue too, I cannot push myself (as much as I want to) so I am stuck doing low impact exercises. Which isn't that bad, because low impact includes swimming, and I really love swimming. I wish I had a pool... an indoor one at that!
I know they work out for an insane amount pretty much for hours and hours a day, every day... I know I cannot do that (I somewhat have a life). Those numbers they get every week! I wish, but I am doing everything I can. I just want to catch up, my goal still is to be able to reach 140 early... even if it is only 1 week. I would be happy with that.
Much love to all my friends and family who stick by me no matter what. <3 you people are amazing! and you know who you are.
Monday, January 30, 2012
Thursday, January 26, 2012
Updating stats
Nothing to say really, but just posting my new stats:
Starting weight: 223.8
Starting weight: 223.8
Small goal: 185
Final goal: 140
Current weight: 189.2
Weight lost: 34.6 lbs
Inches lost: 39
Monday, January 23, 2012
Progress thusfar
I am kind of stuck again and have lost my mojo due to some stressful things in my life right now, so I am just going to post my pics and hope that kick starts me again.
Day One
Day 145
Forgive the really tired face LOL
Forgive the really tired face LOL
I need to see the difference and stop seeing how much I still have left to go. I am a full month behind where I should be and it is stressing me out a lot. I just want to get to my goal, so I can order my wedding dress!
Also, having all my clothes falling off me all the time is annoying! I have given everything away and have like 3 pairs of pants and 4 shirts that fit me :( The only downside of losing weight HAHA! Oh well! It could be worse, they could not fit because I am gaining weight right?
Friday, January 20, 2012
My poor foot :(
I am having so much trouble with my left foot lately, it is making workouts so painful. I used to have a lot of pain in both heels, but since I have lost this first bit of weight, there is no pain at all in my right foot. I thought my left one was getting better, but it is just getting worse.
Today my workout was the 30 day shred and I put my iPad on my inlaws stone age treadmill and watched 8 mile while walking. Swimming would probably be better for me right now, but Caiden is being VERY needy right now and I haven't had the time to go at all.
I keep yo-yoing and it is getting me a little frustrated, it is like my body doesn't want to be 185, so it keeps going up to 190 and then back down.
I am also eager to start riding my bike. As soon as the snow is gone (which should be tomorrow, the way it is raining now) I will take a ride to Herbal Magic and back. 16 kms will be an awesome workout. I used to do that and more when I was in high school. I used to ride from Chemainus to Crofton to visit friends which is about 11km one way. I hope riding a bike is like... well, riding a bike HAHA! I haven't rode one since I was about 18 years old.
Today my workout was the 30 day shred and I put my iPad on my inlaws stone age treadmill and watched 8 mile while walking. Swimming would probably be better for me right now, but Caiden is being VERY needy right now and I haven't had the time to go at all.
I keep yo-yoing and it is getting me a little frustrated, it is like my body doesn't want to be 185, so it keeps going up to 190 and then back down.
I am also eager to start riding my bike. As soon as the snow is gone (which should be tomorrow, the way it is raining now) I will take a ride to Herbal Magic and back. 16 kms will be an awesome workout. I used to do that and more when I was in high school. I used to ride from Chemainus to Crofton to visit friends which is about 11km one way. I hope riding a bike is like... well, riding a bike HAHA! I haven't rode one since I was about 18 years old.
Monday, January 16, 2012
*insert any title you wish*
Been a little bit since I last wrote, I have not had an easy week. I got down to 187 (yippee!) and then bumped all the way up to 191 WTF!, but that is ok. She asked if there was anything I had been doing that might have made me fluctuate that much, and I listed off a shwackload.... TOM, I drank some pop (I was stressed out and it is like a drug for me, So hard to quit!), Doing circuit training with weights.
I have been doing the 30 day shred with 5 lb weights, and my muscles are getting muscles LOL. I wish the waddle on the bottom of my arm would go away though. I know that will come later. I was told to quit the shred, because it is building too much muscle and I should only be concerned with the weightloss and not the toning right now. But, I am so scared I will be like Adam Sandler in the movie Click:
This scares me, because I have a very poor self image already. I don't want to hate my body even more than when I was fat (Because I really don't want to have surgery to have extra skin removed).
On Friday I walked to Herbal Magic from Scotts parents house. An 8km trek in 2 degree weather, it took me 1:34. I got there, and somehow I had pulled the muscle at the top of my thigh, PAINFUL! So I called Scott to come get me, no sense pushing it and hurting myself permanently. I was thinking of doing it again today and trying to walk back as well before the snow comes, but it is just so cold and icey out there... yesterday I could not warm up at all. I really hate the winter.
I scored two bikes off of freecycle the other day; if you have never heard of it, people get rid of their "junk" on it, and other people get it. all free! I have gotten clothes, yarn, household items. My brother got a leather couch off there! If you have one in your area, sign up for it!
Anyways, we got the bikes tuned up and are picking them up today. I am excited to be able to ride a bike again, something I haven't done since high school... I hope it is "just like riding a bike" LOL. Really nice to be able to live here on the Island, and be able to ride a bike in the winter as well.
So my brother and my bestie's engagement party was on Saturday, and it was in a pub. I was so worried about my diet because... well... pub food *NUFF SAID*. But I got there, I said I am taking a day off (something I have not done since I started) and I ordered a drink. It was called "I'll have what she's having" and it was a truly yummy concoction. After a few of those, some nachos and some beer battered fish and 5 fries, I was drunk and feeling bloated and horrible with myself. It is ok though, like I said, I don't really take cheat days... ever!
I stepped on the scale yesterday, and I was 189 again, so I didn't gain, so YAY! This morning I am the same, so I don't think my cheat day screwed me up too much.
I am so eager to get to 185, which is within my grasp, but still seems so far away. I am still losing inches however, and that shows more progress to me than the number on the scale.... Wait... did I just say that?
It is nice to be a little mellow for once about my weight loss goal... although, I am a full month behind where I should be and that makes me a little sad. I wanted to do it early :( Oh well! There is still a chance.
I have been doing the 30 day shred with 5 lb weights, and my muscles are getting muscles LOL. I wish the waddle on the bottom of my arm would go away though. I know that will come later. I was told to quit the shred, because it is building too much muscle and I should only be concerned with the weightloss and not the toning right now. But, I am so scared I will be like Adam Sandler in the movie Click:
This scares me, because I have a very poor self image already. I don't want to hate my body even more than when I was fat (Because I really don't want to have surgery to have extra skin removed).
On Friday I walked to Herbal Magic from Scotts parents house. An 8km trek in 2 degree weather, it took me 1:34. I got there, and somehow I had pulled the muscle at the top of my thigh, PAINFUL! So I called Scott to come get me, no sense pushing it and hurting myself permanently. I was thinking of doing it again today and trying to walk back as well before the snow comes, but it is just so cold and icey out there... yesterday I could not warm up at all. I really hate the winter.
I scored two bikes off of freecycle the other day; if you have never heard of it, people get rid of their "junk" on it, and other people get it. all free! I have gotten clothes, yarn, household items. My brother got a leather couch off there! If you have one in your area, sign up for it!
Anyways, we got the bikes tuned up and are picking them up today. I am excited to be able to ride a bike again, something I haven't done since high school... I hope it is "just like riding a bike" LOL. Really nice to be able to live here on the Island, and be able to ride a bike in the winter as well.
So my brother and my bestie's engagement party was on Saturday, and it was in a pub. I was so worried about my diet because... well... pub food *NUFF SAID*. But I got there, I said I am taking a day off (something I have not done since I started) and I ordered a drink. It was called "I'll have what she's having" and it was a truly yummy concoction. After a few of those, some nachos and some beer battered fish and 5 fries, I was drunk and feeling bloated and horrible with myself. It is ok though, like I said, I don't really take cheat days... ever!
I stepped on the scale yesterday, and I was 189 again, so I didn't gain, so YAY! This morning I am the same, so I don't think my cheat day screwed me up too much.
I am so eager to get to 185, which is within my grasp, but still seems so far away. I am still losing inches however, and that shows more progress to me than the number on the scale.... Wait... did I just say that?
It is nice to be a little mellow for once about my weight loss goal... although, I am a full month behind where I should be and that makes me a little sad. I wanted to do it early :( Oh well! There is still a chance.
Thursday, January 5, 2012
30 day shred
I have been doing the 30 day shred, and today will be my 7th day on level one. I am so bored with level 1 and I just want to move on. I have also been doing the shred during the worst TOM I have ever had. Worst cramps in my life, and doing the crunches is NOT helping!!
I feel good though, I am 2 lbs away from my small goal of 185 and could not be more excited about that. Although my heel has been bothering me a lot and I am having problems being able to go to the gym and working out like I was. Swimming only for this girl for the time being (or low impact stuff in the gym).
This month has just kicked me on my ass, and I am not as driven to hit the big loss numbers, I don't know why. I mean I care if I lose weight... I just don't care (that doesn't make any sense). I cannot even explain myself. Everyone asked me what my resolutions were for 2012, and I didn't really make any... other than to keep the mother effing kitchen clean (which is pretty impossible in my house because a certain someone apparently doesn't know where the dishcloths are... I won't name names LOL). My goals have always been the same though, to lose 84 lbs total by June... Though now I am considering losing more. I will see how I feel when I get there. It will be done with diet and exercise though and I will not be doing it with HM. I want to be able to say I did some on my own, so if I want to try and lose 10-20 more lbs when I get down to 140... I will do it. I have to order my wedding dress by July though, so I cant go too crazy lol.
I keep hearing, "You are so tiny, you don't have xx more lbs to lose!" from so many people, and although it makes me feel awesome to hear that (as I never have before), I am getting frustrated... not because it pisses me off, but if only these people could see what I look like without the clothes on. The things I wear, hide everything that jiggles so well. It really doesn't look like I need to lose 50ish more lbs.
MY THIGHS!!! ahhhh my thighs lost an inch when I started, and HAVE NOT MOVED SINCE!!!! I have always had muscular and big thighs, and that was always the first place my fat went. I just want them to shrink... a little! they are by far my least favorite part on my body, and I am so eager to see those inches go away.
It has been an emotional week for me. I brought flowers to my husbands grave... a place I have not been for so long. I think I was pregnant with Caiden the last time I was there. I felt like he was not in that place, and he was always with me so I never went there... and when I finally did go there, all I felt was guilt. Like I left him there all alone. I miss him so much, his infectious laughter and all the stupid hilarious things he used to do. It has reminded me of all the people that have turned their back on me, and also reminded me of who is the most important to me. I am so thankful for the people in my life, who stand by me no matter what. I love you all.
Anyways, I have to take new pictures soon... although I don't think my body has changed too much. My arms though... wooeee! they are getting amazing LOL! I will take new pictures in the next few days.
I feel good though, I am 2 lbs away from my small goal of 185 and could not be more excited about that. Although my heel has been bothering me a lot and I am having problems being able to go to the gym and working out like I was. Swimming only for this girl for the time being (or low impact stuff in the gym).
This month has just kicked me on my ass, and I am not as driven to hit the big loss numbers, I don't know why. I mean I care if I lose weight... I just don't care (that doesn't make any sense). I cannot even explain myself. Everyone asked me what my resolutions were for 2012, and I didn't really make any... other than to keep the mother effing kitchen clean (which is pretty impossible in my house because a certain someone apparently doesn't know where the dishcloths are... I won't name names LOL). My goals have always been the same though, to lose 84 lbs total by June... Though now I am considering losing more. I will see how I feel when I get there. It will be done with diet and exercise though and I will not be doing it with HM. I want to be able to say I did some on my own, so if I want to try and lose 10-20 more lbs when I get down to 140... I will do it. I have to order my wedding dress by July though, so I cant go too crazy lol.
I keep hearing, "You are so tiny, you don't have xx more lbs to lose!" from so many people, and although it makes me feel awesome to hear that (as I never have before), I am getting frustrated... not because it pisses me off, but if only these people could see what I look like without the clothes on. The things I wear, hide everything that jiggles so well. It really doesn't look like I need to lose 50ish more lbs.
MY THIGHS!!! ahhhh my thighs lost an inch when I started, and HAVE NOT MOVED SINCE!!!! I have always had muscular and big thighs, and that was always the first place my fat went. I just want them to shrink... a little! they are by far my least favorite part on my body, and I am so eager to see those inches go away.
It has been an emotional week for me. I brought flowers to my husbands grave... a place I have not been for so long. I think I was pregnant with Caiden the last time I was there. I felt like he was not in that place, and he was always with me so I never went there... and when I finally did go there, all I felt was guilt. Like I left him there all alone. I miss him so much, his infectious laughter and all the stupid hilarious things he used to do. It has reminded me of all the people that have turned their back on me, and also reminded me of who is the most important to me. I am so thankful for the people in my life, who stand by me no matter what. I love you all.
Anyways, I have to take new pictures soon... although I don't think my body has changed too much. My arms though... wooeee! they are getting amazing LOL! I will take new pictures in the next few days.
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